Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Things I hope my daughters will understand one day

Dearest daughters,

Remember this morning when I went upstairs to do the laundry?  You followed me inside the tiny laundry room,  shut the door behind you,  sat down and stared at me and I sort of - freaked out?  I hope that one day you'll understand that after 8 years of being followed into the bathroom, the closet, the pantry, and now, the laundry room - I just snapped.   I hope you'll understand that I love you every single moment of the day but don't necessarily want to be followed by you every single moment of the day.  There is something to be said about - occasionally - having a tee-tiny bit of space.

Remember last week when I was trying to figure out how to convert the HTML code from my logo and insert it into the right place on my HTML layout for the blog that I don't begin to understand and you came within two inches of my ear and said "mommy" about 10 times and I responded "WHAT?" a little too loudly.  I hope you understand that you are my priority but that sometimes Mommy is actually working on something on the computer that requires work.   Sometimes Mommy's brain is engaged elsewhere and that a little "excuse me Mommy" would go a super long way.

Remember that bad day we had a little while ago?  The one where Mommy had been sick for two weeks and was super tired from not sleeping?   The one where you and your sister stayed home from school because she had that mystery stomach ache that happened only when she was at school for three days in a row?  One day I hope you will understand that, despite the greatest efforts of self-control, sometimes PMS wins.

I actually hope, solely for my sake, that one day you are overwhelmed and have ten kids asking for more things that you can do at one time and you scream, at the top of your lungs, "I AM NOT YOUR SLAVE"!!!

I hope you'll understand that life doesn't revolve around you and that the great injustices you experience when I deny you an extra cookie, the sleepover you so badly desire or when I make you put up your own laundry are actually examples of me doing a good job of being your mother.

I hope you'll understand love and compassion and unselfishness and that a new Justice shirt doesn't truly make you happier in the long run.

I hope you will understand service to others and that making a decision to do what is right for your family even when it isn't what you want to do as an individual is often the best thing.

I hope you understand to choose wisely and treat kindly when you marry.  And that earning a man's respect, admiration and devotion is more important than giving into frivolous intimacy.

Mostly, I hope that you understand - one day when you are married and learning your own way to mother - that I did my very best.  That I made mistakes but that I owned up to them, learned from them and worked to be all I could be as a mother to you.

I have to admit,  there are things about my mother I didn't understand or appreciate until I had kids - like how much effort it takes to do all the things that, as a child, I took for granted.  I now appreciate how much it took from her to just get the kids bathed, dressed, fed and kept alive until adulthood.  So, in case I haven't said it lately, "Thank you, Mom.".   Thank you for loving me. 

And to you dear daughters,  I do love you too - even if you don't understand it yet.  

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1 comment:

  1. Shannon, that was so super sweet! And we all do our best. Praise God he doesn't expect perfection and loves us despite our faults. As your girls will too.